The Year of Ketchup

While preparing to compose today's post, I realized my previous method of naming my posts, by day number counting from the beginning of the post, doesn't really do my blog justice.  So much has happened since I began writing the blog that I could have essentially started back at Day 1 any number of times.  So from here on out I will be trying to name my posts in some sort of creatively relevant manner.

Last night was my second knit in a row of not working on knitting my wedding dress.  I had every intention of working on it, however the pattern with all my notes has temporarily made itself scarce.  I'm going to find it, I know I am, however the break from knitting has given me some time to...  NOT think.  Don't get me wrong...  I LOVE to knit.  And even more, I love to be knitting my wedding dress.  However sometimes my mind just gets going to fast that even concentrating on my pattern can't keep my mind under control.  My thoughts while knitting tend to be focused on money, the wedding (obviously) and a whole lot of randomness, but at times all the thoughts blur together and make me feel anxious.  And with all the good in my life, I don't like to feel anxious.

So last night I spent my time playing on my Kindle Fire, Dave's first big surprise for me over the Christmas/New Year's holiday.  Words With Friends has become an addiction, however last night I was sucked into Sim City.  I remember being in high school, spending weekends at my Dad's and staying up until all hours playing it.  Now that I think about it, even back then it gave me the same escape from reality then as it does now.

Last night's game was going extremely well until my city grew so big that I actually started LOSING money.  And that leads me to my thought of the morning.  How many times can our hopes and dreams become SO large that they actually case us to implode onto ourselves?  We let ourselves take on so much that by the time we realize we're overburdened, we're already caving in under the pressure?

So I realize today, that like Sim City, it is necessary to take life one step at a time.  Last night I found myself building too much of one zone, only to lose money and have them remain empty.  This is like life, only people put eggs into too many baskets and fail to succeed or make an omelette out of any of them.

Dave and I have decided that 2012 is the year of Catch-Up.  (Everytime I say this I want to say Ketchup, with my boys in mind).  But, Suze Orman would probably agree that it's impossible to catch up if you're trying to tackle it all at the same time.  Tackle one at a time and you'll get them all worked out eventually.  Try to handle them all at once and you'll be where you started, with nothing done and nothing more to show for all your stress and efforts.

"So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own."  ~Matthew 6:34

DAY 355, Post 2

While I wrote earlier that today is going better than yesterday, I decided that I have to add that I'm finding it ridiculously difficult to get any work done.  I'm sitting at work more or less staring at screen wondering what I should/have to do next.  It doesn't really help that I'm on top of all the work that's come in and have already gotten 99.9 percent of my work done.  Looking around my cubicle, all I can really see that needs done is that my desk should be wiped down.  But I really don't feel like it.

Dave's packed my lunch for the past couple of days, and after eating I start feeling really sleepy shortly thereafter.  I wish I could unfold a sleeping bag under my desk and take a nap (I type, yawning).

I probably shouldn't be admitting this, but what often fills my day is random thoughts.  I mean, right now I'm staring at my water bottle wondering how many ounces are in a gallon.  Do you know?  (Looking on google.com to find out)  128 fl. oz. are in a gallon.  So...  I have a 32 fl. oz. water bottle and I drink at least two a day.  No wonder another portion of my day is filled with trips to the ladies room!

But with that said, it's time to fill my water bottle back up for the third time today, haha.

DAY 355

Today is going much better that yesterday.  I feel like I can breathe and am in more control of what's going on in my life.  Yes, there are still things I want (and have no control over), like making more money, but as long as we have a roof over our head and food in the cabinets I can handle the rest.  And what I don't feel like I can handle, I can pray for.

DAY 102, Post 2

I can feel my belly growing...  The delicacies prepared by Dave in the kitchen and on the grill are already impacting my weight.  I can feel it.  And it's funny...  I know it's happening because a dress I bought two weeks ago (and am wearing for the first time today) doesn't fit as well around the boobs as it did before.  No, I'm not pregnant.  BUT, I did notice that when I lost weight I lost it in my boobs.  Hmmm...

Today for lunch Dave made barbeque pork chop sandwiches and hot italian sausages on the grill.  I'm afraid I won't make it through the afternoon at work due to falling asleep due to a full-belly enduced euphoria.  The yummy deliciousness is sitting in my stomach, and it's a very good thing there's not a seam running down the front of my dress or I'd be afraid it would split.

Tonight after work Dave and I will be going to play pool with my co-workers.  The guys, minus the manager and assistant manager, have a regular Thursday night weekly outing set up and apparently I'm worthy enough to be invited, haha.  It probably helps that I was able to connect with JM, one of my co-workers, almost immediately by discussing WoW with him. 

Last night Dave and I went down to Beavercreek to go to the Fairfield Mall as well as DSW and Old Navy.  Dave introduced me to Bourbon Chicken (was that the name?) at Cajun Ming, and then I introduced him to Williams Sonoma.  I think the latter overwhelmed him a bit.  I'm not surprised, however, considering the store is packed full of high-quality, over-priced cooking tools.  If I could buy him one of everything, I would.

I was tickled (Pink, haha) to find that Gap had stock of my favorite perfume, "So Pink", still on their shelves.  Unfortunately it's been discontinued, so I'll soon have to find a new fragrance to wear.  Not only do I love it, but Dave as well to the point that he asked me to spray it up under the dashboard in the car on the way home.  Within seconds the aroma of "So Pink" filled the car.  It was lovely, I won't deny, but even more beautiful was the huge smile it put on his face.  Ahhh, how I LOVE seeing his smiles.

I had trouble falling asleep last night, but for a good reason, rather than bad.  I honestly laid there thinking, "Did I die?  Am I in heaven?"  I was going to ask Dave to pinch me, however I decided instead to lie there enjoying being wrapped up in his arms and listening to his soft snoring.  Oh how love is such a beautiful thing!

DAY 77, Post 2

I'm not feeling it today. I've turned to my Bible and prayer notebook to try to find refuge from all of my thoughts. But it's not working.

I have so many "why" questions on my mind, but I know I can't ask for or search for answers. When they are ready to present themselves they will. But God, I wish the answers would present themselves sooner rather than later.

This will be an... Interesting... Week... It will be my last full week at CMG as my job at AH starts a week from Monday. And next weekend I'll have some real furniture in my apartment finally, thanks to Mom and Aunt Flushy. AND... Next Sunday is my re-affirmation at Ginghamsburg.

Today was a rough day. Check out how I described an experience at the park in an email...

"I took the boys and Penny to the park today after church and I sat there reading my Bible... And then I heard (Thing 2) scream. He came running at me with a bloody nose and dirt and mulch all over his back.

"Some kid (and you better believe I let him and the adults he was with have it) told (Thing 2) he needed to make a sacrifice for him. A sacrifice,... What the hell does a child (Thing 2's) age or even (Thing 1's) age know about the word "sacrifice"?

"But the conversation in the car shocked me. (Thing 1) asked me what the word sacrifice means, and (Thing 2) said "to get hurt so someone else doesn't have to." I guess (Thing 2) has been listening at church when Pastor Mike says that Jesus sacrificed himself on the cross for all of our sins."

The rest of this email doesn't help with my current attitude or my thought pattern today. I'll leave this post at that.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

DAY 69, Post 2

Tonight I went to the recovery service at Ginghamsburg Church, and unlike my last experience there, tonight was VERY powerful.  And I walked out feeling uplifted and with a new purpose.

Tonight, I take my step back.  No more letters, emails or contact with CL-WoW...  For at least a month or two.  Because my reasons, while I have wanted to help him, HAVE been rooted in selfishness.  And yes, while I would welcome him in anytime he comes, my desires for him have taken away from my focus on Christ, my children and myself.  And I can do this no longer.  And my contact with him has taken away from his focus on Christ, his daughter and himself.  And I can't do this any longer either.

But I take my step back not with regret, but with thankfulness.  Thankfulness that I learned that I can love for another human being (besides for my boys or immediate family) in a way that I never knew possible.  Thankfulness that Christ provided me the desire and capacity to give everything that I can for someone else, no matter the hurt that he may have caused me.

So, while I step away, I will not deny that I will hold him in my thoughts.  I will pray that he and his situation improve.  I will continue to write to him, but will hold my messages in a notebook until the time comes that I can either throw them away or feel that it is time to give them to him.  And I know I will dream of him.  And I will continue to love him.  And I hope he knows that whenever he is ready/willing/able, he has at least a friend here who loves him.

BUT...  I will be more adament in focusing on my faith.  Including prayer in my day, every morning, afternoon and night.  Asking Jesus for his grace, mercy and forgiveness.  And asking that he guide me on the path that I am meant to be on.  I must add that today at work, everytime I found myself thinking about CL-WoW, I interupted myself and said the Lord's Prayer...  repeatedly.  And while I did think of CL-WoW multiple times, by repeatedly I mean that I said the Lord's Prayer repeatedly.  And tonight at service we said it again.  And oh, what a blessing that was.

As I sat in service tonight, I thought about all the recovering alcoholics and addicts sitting around me and I felt overwhelmed.  I was in awe that these wonderful people were able to turn their lives around and find salvation in Christ.  They are able to refocus their lives on something good, both for themselves and Christ.  And that is what I need to do as well.  So, thank you to my fellow service attendees.  You are an inspiration to me.  May be all find what we need in this life by following Christ and welcoming him in our lives and hearts.

DAY 68, Post 3

I'm really beginning to resent my neighbor's car alarm.  It has a double honk, and the "beep beep" gets me every time, as do the placement of their headlights.  I need to find something else to focus on.  Something else to distract me and put my thoughts into, as this isn't working for me.

It was a tough day at work.  It was a tough day period.  I entered this week feeling really optimistic about what could lie ahead, and so far I...  Haven't been totally disappointed but it's not where I thought I would be this week.  At all.

DAY 67, Post 2

I am completely exhausted, physically and just about emotionally.  I worked 9-1/2 hours today, which was long, but was nice because it got me a little bit closer to having overtime this week as I was only scheduled for 7 hours.  But still, working 2-1/2 hours past when I was planning becomes a little draining.  Luckily, the last couple hours flew by.

I found myself scanning the line all day, however, to see if there was anyone I knew.  And by someone I know, I mean either the face of CL-WoW whom I long to see, or CT, who is always a friendly face to see.  Either would have been welcome, despite my differing reasons for wanting to see them individually.

Tonight is night two of not having the boys.  Per the divorce agreement, DH has them Wednesday and Thursday nights, and because he has them this weekend (Friday - Sunday nights), I will not see them until Monday.  It makes for a VERY quiet apartment when I get home, and on nights like tonight when I'm drained, I don't really know what to do with myself.  It's too early to go to bed, however I had intended to go to the grocery store and I really don't feel like it.  I should go though.  Perhaps when I'm done posting.

Actually, I don't know what else to write.  My mind is just sorta...  Numb.  I don't think I can put into sentences anything that is running through my brain right now.  And as disgusting as it might sound, I could really go for an (entire) angel food cake and a Green Goodness.  I think I might just make that trip to the grocery store.

DAY 64, Post 3

Like the rest of this year, today was a truly cleansing day.  Not only did I clean up the apartment, but I also cleaned up my life a bit.  And no, I didn't let go of that biggest lingering thought in my life.  But, I did let go, in a way of another.

It's sad to see this year how "friends" have been one of the least clean, negative things in my life.  I entered this year thinking I knew who my local best friends were.  And while I still have GREAT friends in the area (so please don't be offended if you're among them), the ones who have chosen to remove themselves from my life, in one way or another, is somewhat dismaying.  I'm happy, however, that today's cleansing did not involve losing a friend. 

Penny, unfortunately, got a cleansing of her own today.  I put her outside this morning and five minutes later went to let her in to realize that it had started pouring.  Poor puppy was soaking wet.  It's funny...  Her fur when she is wet looks like somebody spent hours crimping it like my sisters and I did in the 80's.

DAY 63, Post 3

Church was amazing this morning.  Pastor Mike spoke a lot about forgiveness and said a few things that really spoke to me.

"Mercy is grace for the undeserved."

"Forgiveness isn't just for the offender but also for the one who was offended."

"The wise forgive but don't forget."

"Don't be a grace abuser."

"Divorce is sometimes the lesser of two mistakes."

No, I don't remember all of these things by myself when I leave church, but I take notes in the back of my Bible during the service.  And I'm so glad I do.  At first I worried that writing and highlighting in my Bible was sacreligious, but I've realized that how else am I going to remember the lessons and thoughts that really touched me?

A specific Bible verse also touched me...

"Let any one of you who is without a sin be the first to throw a stone at her."

John 8:7

Like my scoffer last night, how often are we ready to cast judgement on someone else, when we ourselves have committed wrongs in our own lives?  And how fair is that?

You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgement on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself..."

Romans 2:1

I left church feeling total forgiveness for all wrongs committed against me.  And I mean ALL wrongs.  And I can't tell you how much more uplifted I feel.  To not feel anger or hatred is a marvelous thing.  I hope that someday all the offenders, and anyone else as well, will be able to feel such forgiveness towards me.



For if you forgive others when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Matthew 6:14-15

DAY 62, Post 5

I'm struggling tonight. With loneliness... With hurt... With worry. With anguish... With frustration. With too many thoughts... And I can't stand it.

I started a prayer notebook tonight, hoping that by praying to Jesus in written form (for some reason its easier for me to pray on paper than in my head) that I'll be able to ease my mind. Unfortunately I was left with one big question... Why?

Unfortunately I'm ready to cry myself to sleep, but although I'm just about there, I seem to be unable to cry. I haven't cried in a couple of weeks now. And it's not due to lack of emotion, because God knows that the emotion is there. But for some reason, I have lost the ability. And while some might think that to be a good thing, I could use a mind clearing, gut-wrenching cry. I don't know... Maybe I'm fooling myself into thinking it will make me feel better.

DAY 61, Post 2

I can't really express how I've felt today.  My emotions, feelings, etc. run all over the gamut.  Tired, motivated, proud, spiritual...  Those are just a few...

I covered a shift at work this morning for a girl who has now lost her job for not showing up and not calling up for a few shifts earlier this week.  As much as I can't stand my job sometimes, I can't imagine just letting it go.  And that's not to say there aren't times I just want to quit.  Because there certainly are.  But even if/when I find a better job, I still planning on keeping this one just as a back-up.  Will I be exhausted from working so much?  Hell, yea!  But I never want to be in the situation where I don't have a job again.  So if it takes two jobs to ensure this, then so-be-it.

While I hate to admit it, I was able to pay my rent today, by myself, for the first time since I moved in here in December.  And writing that rent check was...  Exhilirating.  After that I came home and paid part of my electricity bill as well.  Thank goodness for companies that allow partial payments!  While I could have paid the full amount that my bill showed, that would have left only a little bit of money in my account until I get paid in two weeks.  And I don't like having that little in my account.  I think I've written it before, but it's amazing how I can manage my money when I don't have a lot, but when I did have...  More...  I handled it like shit.  I don't think I've had one overdraft charge since I moved out in December.  Woo hoo for me! 

After getting home I cleaned the living room, washed one batch of dishes, took care of the trash and did a load and a half of laundry.  I wouldn't have had to do the second load of laundry but the darn cat won't stop peeing on Thing 1's bed.  Yuck, I know.  But with Penny here, Miki has taken up refuge in Thing 1's room. 

And Penny...  Damn her sometimes...  This morning I found her chewing Thing 1's NEW hearing aid, which he had left on the floor last night.  Not the place to leave it by any means, but damn it, Penny!  Thing 1 lost his hearing aid the day we moved out and DH just took him to get this new one three weeks ago.  Hearing aids, for those of you who don't know, are NOT covered by health insurance, and cost over a thousand dollars each.  So...  I will have the pleasure of covering the cost of the new earmold.  The earmold is the plastic piece that goes into the ear.  Thank goodness the electronic part was spared from Penny's wrath.

The boys have realized that the weekends they are with me coincide with the Friday's I get paid.  Thing 2 has been begging for a new baseball glove, however that's not in the budget right now.  Neither is dinner at La Fiesta, which they have been asking for as well.  The baseball glove isn't a necessity, however his glove from last year is currently missing, as is Thing 1's baseball bat.  And Thing 1's baseball practice started this week, so...  Yea...

Tomorrow is the last Saturday of sports for the boys at the YMCA until the fall, for which I am immensely grateful.  While I enjoy watching the boys play, spending over three hours of my Saturdays off at the YMCA is not the highlight of my weekend.  I'll be much happier this spring and summer watching them play baseball, especially since I am not coaching this season.  I'll miss coaching, without a doubt, but with my job at CMG, I can't afford to take off all the time for practice and games.  I don't think a parent realizes just how much time and energy coaching takes until they've done it themselves.  Unfortunately for the coaches, they suffer sometimes from the wrath of parents who don't realize the sacrifices the coaching parents make.

This week I have learned the value of patience, from a variety of experiences.  Work, customers, CL-WoW have each taught me a bit.  And I appreciate the lessons each have provided.  It's amazing, however, how much the customers taught me, and not necessarily in a positive way.  With the computers down yesterday, it was amazing how nasty some customers got when they couldn't speed through the line as they normally do.  But then there are the customers behind the nasty customers who try to make the cashier's (my) day better by joking about the previous customers.  Two women especially, put a smile on my face yesterday when they commented on the customer in front of them.  So thank you, ladies!  Patience truly is a virtue!

So for the next few weeks and months, I will exercise patience.  And it's going to be an interesting couple of weeks.  I could be divorced this coming Tuesday if everything goes smoothly at our pre-trial.  Or, it could be just shy of two weeks from now when I'm officially divorced, and if that's the case, I will patiently await the day.  I thought about the day for years, and I can patiently wait a couple more weeks for it.  And as for the other things/situations I am hoping for, I will patiently wait for them as well.  No more trying to force them to happen sooner rather than later.  If they happen, they will happen when they are supposed to.  But in the meantime I need to remind myself to focus on what I need rather than what I want.

DAY 58, Post 2

With friends and family who love me and have always wanted to see me reach my full potential, I've never had to worry about receiving an earful of encouragement, advice or criticism, even when I didn't want it. And although I haven't always listened, I'm extremely grateful that these wonderful people are in my life.

I sit here at work, on my break, thinking about people who don't have the support I do. They struggle through life, no one to guide them or hold their hand, or even to tell them when they've fucked up (pardon my language). They repeatedly make the wrong mistakes, and like an idiot expect a different result each time. And unfortunately for some of these people, when something good does come to them, they find a way to mess that up.

I think I've been an enabler of such people. I've tried to be a nice person, and as such have not given the (constructive) criticism that was due. And it's as detrimental to me as it is to them. I stand by, caring and worrying, offering my positive emotional support, yet nothing is gained. For me or them. They still haven't learned as I chose to be quiet with my opinions and thoughts. And that sucks for the both of us. Because while things could change, they don't.

So what do I do? Change myself for other people? Or can I look at it as changing myself for myself? Speak up when I have an opinion at the risk of hurting others? And I have to ask myself... What does God want me to do? Because my current ways don't seem to make a difference. And that makes me one of those idiots.

DAY 57, Post 5

Now I'm 95% sure about what I saw earlier.  And instead of being angry, I'm just sad.

Revelations like this make me wonder why would God do this?  I know He tests us in so many ways, but why would He make us so happy just to take us to a point of unhappiness and heartbreak that was never known before?  I can't imagine the lesson that I am supposed to learn in this.

I put myself out on the line again, and I'm realizing I'm just being foolish.  An idiot is a person who keeps doing the same things over and over expecting a different result.  While I would like to think the idiot is NOT me, perhaps it is.  And it sucks.  Sucks that I would put myself out there repeatedly and only get an ounce of respect in return, at the most.

While some would say they would rather not hurt somebody and therefore not respond, I think that's chickenish and even more hurtful.  And I doubt that person can be honest with him/herself if they can't be honest with others.  And I don't want to be a digger, but dammit...  Be honest already!  What are you going to gain in the world if you can't be?  Only more hurt for you AND other people!

DAY 57, Post 3

I've realized I'm tired.  Tired of thinking.  Tired of worrying.  Tired of the drives out there.  But I want it to be worth it.  I don't want to doubt my reasons.  I want to know that I'm doing what I should be doing.  BIG sigh.

On a positive note, my boys are home with me.  Right now they are sharing Goldfish with Penny and asking what we're having for dinner.  And I don't have a clue.  Honestly, I don't feel like cooking.  And I worked until 3pm and had my employee meal when my shift was over so I'm not really hungry. 

DAY 54, Post 5

I've come to the realization that my thoughts, my worries, are impossible to silence. So is, apparently, the backspace key after an evening out involving a bottle of Merlot.

I had a pleasant evening out in the company of a nice guy, but the whole time I was thinking about, and worrying about CL-WoW. Even now, bundled up in my bed with my legs wrapped around my body pillow, my thoughts remain on him. How is he doing? Is he alright? Could he use someone to talk to? Could he use a hug?

Seriously, the backspace button on my Blackberry is saving me from looking like an ass. I probably look like one anyway though. At this point, I don't really care.

DAY 54, Post 4

I took the boys' clothes over to DH's house and then got back in my car and started driving.  It was about the time that I got to the square that I realized, "What am I doing?"  I drove around the square and drove back home.  And here I am...

I don't like being worried.  I want to send a text to find out how he's doing.  But I can't.  I want to send an email.  But I won't.  I want to so terribly, but I won't.  I dread this is his last couple of days with his daughter, and I'm not going to interupt that...  Even if he's not checking his email.

So I'll sit here, watch TV and knit.  I'm working on the pocket that goes on the front of the sweater.  I'm thinking of finishing it, sewing it to the front and then stuffing it with Cellas.  What good is a pocket if there's nothing worthwhile inside?  Sure, I'd love for my hands to be inside, but...  Big sigh.

DAY 48, Post 2

This day is already emotionally hard, and I want so much but I feel incredibly selfish. Maybe I said that wrong... I want to give so much.

I'm at the Y with the boys right now, but my head and heart are elsewhere. Is he ok? Is he celebrating his birthday alone? Is he curled up with his blankets over his head wallowing? Would a hug make any of it better? Did he get my birthday card or my email? If so, did he appreciate them or does he even care that I sent them?

I detest this not-knowing. I am not a fan of uncertainty, and despite all I do, I care too much to... Not care. It's not in me.

It's not even my birthday, but I care too much about whether or not it's a good one to stop thinking about it... About him. And the silence is deafening.

DAY 47, Post 2

It's been quite a day, and emotionally draining just about the whole way.

I had forgotten that I had requested today off months ago for CL-WoW's birthday which is tomorrow, and it was hard to sit here thinking about that.  Even though I closed last night and got out really late, I almost wished I would get called in today just so I would have something to keep my mind off of him.

But...  I went to the mall.  With having lost so much weight, my clothes are a constant battle for me.  I managed to find some REALLY nice sales at Old Navy and got a pair of pants, two shirts and a dress (appropriate for interviews, work or going out) for a total of $40.  I felt really good about that, although it does hurt to spend any money on myself.

After shopping I was tired (a combination of working late, going to bed at 2am and getting up at 7:30am) and laid down for a little bit.  I finished reading Genesis, the first book of the Bible, and am looking forward to starting Exodus tomorrow.  I tried to take a nap after, however Penny found the opportunity to bark at every single noise outside.  And considering what a BEAUTIFUL day it was, there was a lot of noise between kids, people, etc.

Tonight Things 1 and 2 had their worst meltdown since we moved into this apartment.  They were fighting over my computer, and it turned into a shoving/biting/hitting match.  I told them it was time for bed (it was 8:30) and they had MAJOR fits.  To the point that Thing 1 told me he was going to jump out his bedroom window and he wanted to live with his dad.  That was sooo hard for me to hear.  He also told me that he is a "bad boy" and none of the kids at school like him.  It took about 20 minutes for me to correct this right frame of mind, and I had to tickle him until he would say "I'm not a bad boy."  I do not want my boys to believe they are bad boys.  Do they make bad decisions sometimes?  Yes!  But don't we all?

DH and I texted just a few minutes ago about the rough night, and it turns out the boys are telling both of us that the other parent gives them three chances.  And we both tell them that they know the rules and one chance to correct their behavior is enough.  It's nice that although we really can't talk, we can at least agree on one thing.

DAY 42, Post 2

I'm feeling a little bit like a Mercy Me song I've been listening to...

"I'm finding myself
At a loss for words
And the funny thing is
It's ok."
~Word of God Speak

This past week was interesting...  Good, bad, easy, difficult, funny, sad, etc.  I really don't know what, if anything, I could say about it.

Entertaining enough, however, was work yesterday.  The hot water heater broke, again, so the restaurant had to shut down for a bit at 3:30ish.  I was off at 4, however, so it didn't impact me.  I hadn't gotten a break, so I helped reduce some of the inventory before they had to throw it out by eating before leaving.  While I was eating, the evening shift crew started cleaning, preparing for a solid close.  One of the workers was cleaning the fryer (I think) and the next thing I knew, I heard yelling and saw flames, small flames, coming from the fryer.  It's funny how some people, including myself, don't know how to put out a grease fire.  Luckily someone knew and threw salt on the flames.

Tonight I tried out the Singles Group at Ginghamsburg.  I was younger than everyone else by about 15 years and for me that was sort of difficult.  I can't explain it, but to say I was looking for people closer to my age who would know what I'm going through.  While some of them knew and understood, I just felt...  Awkward.  I decided to leave at "Intermission" and come home.

CT and I hung out for the past two nights, and Julie helped me organize my inventory on Friday night.  Thank you, Julie!  I made pasta on Friday night for CT and I, and I have to say that a highlight of the evening was the pasta readiness test...  After we had already eaten.  There is a secret to throwing pasta, and sometimes it sticks better than others.

Right now I'm watching the portion of Star Trek (the movie) that I slept through last night.  We started off the night with Jackass 3 and pizza from Cassanos (thank you, Bronco!!), but I just couldn't last through a second movie.  I don't think I've ever been able to last through two movies.  Jackass 3, by the way, is hilarious, but also gag-inducing.  I'm just glad the boys didn't see it.  I don't even want to think about the crazy ideas they would get watching it.

Now, I think it's laundry time for me.  So much to fold, and I believe a clean apartment would make me feel better.  Unfortunately all the scrapbooking supplies I recovered are taking up a huge amount of space.