Showing posts with label Clothes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Clothes. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Knit 1, Wedding 2, We'll Make 5
Last night I finished knitting, crocheting, and sewing in the loose ends completely on my wedding dress. I can't even express the sense of accomplishment I feel. Not only is it complete, but it FITS! I'll post again later today, but here's a picture of me in the dress. More/better pictures will come on/after the big day! Now I'm thinking of knitting a shawl in the same feather/fan pattern to wear around me with the dress, as I can't count on this unseasonably warm weather to be around then. I can hope and pray though!
Monday, February 6, 2012
Do Your Laundry
As I climbed into bed last night I could help but to think about how simple things, like crawling into my own bed each night, can be taken for granted. From there I began to think about the other earthly pleasures I take for granted, most of them on a daily basis.
Why did I have such thoughts?
Here's why...
Pretty much unrecognizable, that's a clothes dryer in the middle of the picture, next to the chair. Or should I say a charred dryer next to a charred chair?
Upon arriving home from church yesterday, Dave, the boys and I were welcomed by firetrucks and a Red Cross van in our driveway. Three apartments down, a young mother had put her daughters down for a nap, and walked out of their room into a cloud of black smoke coming out of the dryer. She opened the door and flames burst out at her. From there, the fire spread around the apartment, and between the flames and the smoke, the possessions they held dear were destroyed.
No clothes.
No furniture.
No toys.
No... Anything...
Dave and I pulled together a couple bags of clothes for her and her fiance and I was able to find a few baby blankets left over from my boys for her 5 month old. And Thing 2 brought tears to her eyes when he presented her with a stuffed elephant for her 2 year old. But I went to bed wanting to be able to do more.
As I lay down to sleep, however, it truly hit me how much they lost. Everything must be re-acquired. From a cup to drink out of to toothbrushes and towels. Baby clothes and diapers, and a chair to sit on. Wow.
I seem to be full of pleas for my readers (if I have any) lately, but here's a couple more...
1. Check out dryer vents and lint traps regularly. Your lint trap should be emptied before EVERY load. A clogged vent can not only cause clothes to not by dried in one cycle, but can burn out your heating element, or worse, start a fire. If you rent, ask your landlord to clean your vent at least once a year.
2. Invest in renter's insurance. If you own your home, your home owner's insurance would cover a disaster such as this. However if you rent, you need to cover yourself. And in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't cost that much. Geico, for instance, charges approximately $40/month. Does that sound like a lot? Think about EVERYTHING you'd need to replace if your apartment burnt down. Yea...
Why did I have such thoughts?
Here's why...
Pretty much unrecognizable, that's a clothes dryer in the middle of the picture, next to the chair. Or should I say a charred dryer next to a charred chair?
Upon arriving home from church yesterday, Dave, the boys and I were welcomed by firetrucks and a Red Cross van in our driveway. Three apartments down, a young mother had put her daughters down for a nap, and walked out of their room into a cloud of black smoke coming out of the dryer. She opened the door and flames burst out at her. From there, the fire spread around the apartment, and between the flames and the smoke, the possessions they held dear were destroyed.
No clothes.
No furniture.
No toys.
No... Anything...
Dave and I pulled together a couple bags of clothes for her and her fiance and I was able to find a few baby blankets left over from my boys for her 5 month old. And Thing 2 brought tears to her eyes when he presented her with a stuffed elephant for her 2 year old. But I went to bed wanting to be able to do more.
As I lay down to sleep, however, it truly hit me how much they lost. Everything must be re-acquired. From a cup to drink out of to toothbrushes and towels. Baby clothes and diapers, and a chair to sit on. Wow.
I seem to be full of pleas for my readers (if I have any) lately, but here's a couple more...
1. Check out dryer vents and lint traps regularly. Your lint trap should be emptied before EVERY load. A clogged vent can not only cause clothes to not by dried in one cycle, but can burn out your heating element, or worse, start a fire. If you rent, ask your landlord to clean your vent at least once a year.
2. Invest in renter's insurance. If you own your home, your home owner's insurance would cover a disaster such as this. However if you rent, you need to cover yourself. And in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't cost that much. Geico, for instance, charges approximately $40/month. Does that sound like a lot? Think about EVERYTHING you'd need to replace if your apartment burnt down. Yea...
Monday, January 16, 2012
Day 351
I've been wanting to write so badly for the last couple of weeks, however I wanted to wait to share the incredible news I have...
Dave and I are engaged!
Throughout each day, every day, I never cease to be astounded by the changes and experiences I have had over the past year. And now I have gone back around full circle to where I wanted to be when I started this blog nearly a year ago.
Now I am in the process of knitting my wedding dress for the small ceremony, which we will be having in March with immediate family. Here's where I am right now...
I'm only about 15 inches (of 41) through, but I hope it will speed up a little now that I am starting to decrease. It's worked from the bottom up in a feather and fan pattern. All I can REALLY hope is that it fits when it is finished.
Dave and I are engaged!
Throughout each day, every day, I never cease to be astounded by the changes and experiences I have had over the past year. And now I have gone back around full circle to where I wanted to be when I started this blog nearly a year ago.
Now I am in the process of knitting my wedding dress for the small ceremony, which we will be having in March with immediate family. Here's where I am right now...
I'm only about 15 inches (of 41) through, but I hope it will speed up a little now that I am starting to decrease. It's worked from the bottom up in a feather and fan pattern. All I can REALLY hope is that it fits when it is finished.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Day 226
Monday got my week off to a bumpy start but Tuesday seems to be starting much better. The boys even got up before me this morning and were ready to leave for daycare by 7:30, which... Got me to work EARLY!
This morning Dave sent me a quote request he got at his new job. A customer requested multiples of certain items, and while my first response was "Oh my goodness!", at second glance I couldn't help but notice that the customer wrote (s)he "needed" a quote for these items. It never ceases to amaze me what people think they need. And when I think about it, "Need" is really such a strong word. Think about it. What do you REALLY need? Food? Water? Clothing or some variation of? And some type of shelter? But isn't that it?
DH used to say "I need a #1..." when we went through the McDonalds drive through, and I found it obnoxious then. I think now I realize that people saying "I need..." is one of my few pet peeves. I challenge you, from here on out, to listen to yourself when you're asking for something. Are you polite? Do you say "please" and "thank you"? Try it. You might surprise yourself.
This morning Dave sent me a quote request he got at his new job. A customer requested multiples of certain items, and while my first response was "Oh my goodness!", at second glance I couldn't help but notice that the customer wrote (s)he "needed" a quote for these items. It never ceases to amaze me what people think they need. And when I think about it, "Need" is really such a strong word. Think about it. What do you REALLY need? Food? Water? Clothing or some variation of? And some type of shelter? But isn't that it?
DH used to say "I need a #1..." when we went through the McDonalds drive through, and I found it obnoxious then. I think now I realize that people saying "I need..." is one of my few pet peeves. I challenge you, from here on out, to listen to yourself when you're asking for something. Are you polite? Do you say "please" and "thank you"? Try it. You might surprise yourself.
Thursday, May 12, 2011
DAY 102, Post 2
I can feel my belly growing... The delicacies prepared by Dave in the kitchen and on the grill are already impacting my weight. I can feel it. And it's funny... I know it's happening because a dress I bought two weeks ago (and am wearing for the first time today) doesn't fit as well around the boobs as it did before. No, I'm not pregnant. BUT, I did notice that when I lost weight I lost it in my boobs. Hmmm...
Today for lunch Dave made barbeque pork chop sandwiches and hot italian sausages on the grill. I'm afraid I won't make it through the afternoon at work due to falling asleep due to a full-belly enduced euphoria. The yummy deliciousness is sitting in my stomach, and it's a very good thing there's not a seam running down the front of my dress or I'd be afraid it would split.
Tonight after work Dave and I will be going to play pool with my co-workers. The guys, minus the manager and assistant manager, have a regular Thursday night weekly outing set up and apparently I'm worthy enough to be invited, haha. It probably helps that I was able to connect with JM, one of my co-workers, almost immediately by discussing WoW with him.
Last night Dave and I went down to Beavercreek to go to the Fairfield Mall as well as DSW and Old Navy. Dave introduced me to Bourbon Chicken (was that the name?) at Cajun Ming, and then I introduced him to Williams Sonoma. I think the latter overwhelmed him a bit. I'm not surprised, however, considering the store is packed full of high-quality, over-priced cooking tools. If I could buy him one of everything, I would.
I was tickled (Pink, haha) to find that Gap had stock of my favorite perfume, "So Pink", still on their shelves. Unfortunately it's been discontinued, so I'll soon have to find a new fragrance to wear. Not only do I love it, but Dave as well to the point that he asked me to spray it up under the dashboard in the car on the way home. Within seconds the aroma of "So Pink" filled the car. It was lovely, I won't deny, but even more beautiful was the huge smile it put on his face. Ahhh, how I LOVE seeing his smiles.
I had trouble falling asleep last night, but for a good reason, rather than bad. I honestly laid there thinking, "Did I die? Am I in heaven?" I was going to ask Dave to pinch me, however I decided instead to lie there enjoying being wrapped up in his arms and listening to his soft snoring. Oh how love is such a beautiful thing!
Today for lunch Dave made barbeque pork chop sandwiches and hot italian sausages on the grill. I'm afraid I won't make it through the afternoon at work due to falling asleep due to a full-belly enduced euphoria. The yummy deliciousness is sitting in my stomach, and it's a very good thing there's not a seam running down the front of my dress or I'd be afraid it would split.
Tonight after work Dave and I will be going to play pool with my co-workers. The guys, minus the manager and assistant manager, have a regular Thursday night weekly outing set up and apparently I'm worthy enough to be invited, haha. It probably helps that I was able to connect with JM, one of my co-workers, almost immediately by discussing WoW with him.
Last night Dave and I went down to Beavercreek to go to the Fairfield Mall as well as DSW and Old Navy. Dave introduced me to Bourbon Chicken (was that the name?) at Cajun Ming, and then I introduced him to Williams Sonoma. I think the latter overwhelmed him a bit. I'm not surprised, however, considering the store is packed full of high-quality, over-priced cooking tools. If I could buy him one of everything, I would.
I was tickled (Pink, haha) to find that Gap had stock of my favorite perfume, "So Pink", still on their shelves. Unfortunately it's been discontinued, so I'll soon have to find a new fragrance to wear. Not only do I love it, but Dave as well to the point that he asked me to spray it up under the dashboard in the car on the way home. Within seconds the aroma of "So Pink" filled the car. It was lovely, I won't deny, but even more beautiful was the huge smile it put on his face. Ahhh, how I LOVE seeing his smiles.
I had trouble falling asleep last night, but for a good reason, rather than bad. I honestly laid there thinking, "Did I die? Am I in heaven?" I was going to ask Dave to pinch me, however I decided instead to lie there enjoying being wrapped up in his arms and listening to his soft snoring. Oh how love is such a beautiful thing!
DAY 102, Post 2
I can feel my belly growing... The delicacies prepared by Dave in the kitchen and on the grill are already impacting my weight. I can feel it. And it's funny... I know it's happening because a dress I bought two weeks ago (and am wearing for the first time today) doesn't fit as well around the boobs as it did before. No, I'm not pregnant. BUT, I did notice that when I lost weight I lost it in my boobs. Hmmm...
Today for lunch Dave made barbeque pork chop sandwiches and hot italian sausages on the grill. I'm afraid I won't make it through the afternoon at work due to falling asleep due to a full-belly enduced euphoria. The yummy deliciousness is sitting in my stomach, and it's a very good thing there's not a seam running down the front of my dress or I'd be afraid it would split.
Tonight after work Dave and I will be going to play pool with my co-workers. The guys, minus the manager and assistant manager, have a regular Thursday night weekly outing set up and apparently I'm worthy enough to be invited, haha. It probably helps that I was able to connect with JM, one of my co-workers, almost immediately by discussing WoW with him.
Last night Dave and I went down to Beavercreek to go to the Fairfield Mall as well as DSW and Old Navy. Dave introduced me to Bourbon Chicken (was that the name?) at Cajun Ming, and then I introduced him to Williams Sonoma. I think the latter overwhelmed him a bit. I'm not surprised, however, considering the store is packed full of high-quality, over-priced cooking tools. If I could buy him one of everything, I would.
I was tickled (Pink, haha) to find that Gap had stock of my favorite perfume, "So Pink", still on their shelves. Unfortunately it's been discontinued, so I'll soon have to find a new fragrance to wear. Not only do I love it, but Dave as well to the point that he asked me to spray it up under the dashboard in the car on the way home. Within seconds the aroma of "So Pink" filled the car. It was lovely, I won't deny, but even more beautiful was the huge smile it put on his face. Ahhh, how I LOVE seeing his smiles.
I had trouble falling asleep last night, but for a good reason, rather than bad. I honestly laid there thinking, "Did I die? Am I in heaven?" I was going to ask Dave to pinch me, however I decided instead to lie there enjoying being wrapped up in his arms and listening to his soft snoring. Oh how love is such a beautiful thing!
Today for lunch Dave made barbeque pork chop sandwiches and hot italian sausages on the grill. I'm afraid I won't make it through the afternoon at work due to falling asleep due to a full-belly enduced euphoria. The yummy deliciousness is sitting in my stomach, and it's a very good thing there's not a seam running down the front of my dress or I'd be afraid it would split.
Tonight after work Dave and I will be going to play pool with my co-workers. The guys, minus the manager and assistant manager, have a regular Thursday night weekly outing set up and apparently I'm worthy enough to be invited, haha. It probably helps that I was able to connect with JM, one of my co-workers, almost immediately by discussing WoW with him.
Last night Dave and I went down to Beavercreek to go to the Fairfield Mall as well as DSW and Old Navy. Dave introduced me to Bourbon Chicken (was that the name?) at Cajun Ming, and then I introduced him to Williams Sonoma. I think the latter overwhelmed him a bit. I'm not surprised, however, considering the store is packed full of high-quality, over-priced cooking tools. If I could buy him one of everything, I would.
I was tickled (Pink, haha) to find that Gap had stock of my favorite perfume, "So Pink", still on their shelves. Unfortunately it's been discontinued, so I'll soon have to find a new fragrance to wear. Not only do I love it, but Dave as well to the point that he asked me to spray it up under the dashboard in the car on the way home. Within seconds the aroma of "So Pink" filled the car. It was lovely, I won't deny, but even more beautiful was the huge smile it put on his face. Ahhh, how I LOVE seeing his smiles.
I had trouble falling asleep last night, but for a good reason, rather than bad. I honestly laid there thinking, "Did I die? Am I in heaven?" I was going to ask Dave to pinch me, however I decided instead to lie there enjoying being wrapped up in his arms and listening to his soft snoring. Oh how love is such a beautiful thing!
Monday, May 9, 2011
DAY 99, Post 1
It's been another amazing week. Yesterday was Mother's Day and I do not hesitate to say it was the BEST Mother's Day I have celebrated. It was DH's weekend to have the boys (although I had them from 11am - 7pm yesterday) and... I got to sleep in! At about 10am I was woken up by Dave with kisses and an invitation to the kitchen for breakfast. And what a breakfast it was! He had made me a HUMONGOUS omelet with shrimp scampi, onions, salsa, mushrooms (?) and lots of other deliciousness and I got to enjoy Breakfast with the Beatles with him.
After we picked up the boys we went to church, and then home where the boys were blown away to see that Dave's TV has made it's way to Troy... And the Wii and old TV are now set up in Jacob's room. Dave has been VERY helpful in implementing discipline in the house, and not in a harsh manner. Actually, his method of discipline is all about earning respect and rights by giving respect and contributing to the house. So, the although the Wii and TV are now in Jacob's room, the remotes for all of the above are in our show organizer in the front hallway, out of reach in the top row of shoe holders. The boys are now aware that in order to play/watch ANYTHING, they must have done all their chores and have been respectful all day. There are no second chances on being respectful.
Later yesterday afternoon the four of us went to Brukner Nature Center. We walked the path(s) for a while, but because of all the rain, we suddenly found ourselves without a path and surrounded by mud and water. While at first we tried to stay dry and clean, it didn't work for two long. I will add pictures to this post later tonight. We almost had a pet snake, however (and thankfully) the thing escaped from Dave's pocket somewhere along the walk. I can't say I'm disappointed, although I know the boys were.
When we got home I attempted to wash/dry all of our sneakers however I managed to break the dryer in the process. Dave's been working on fixing it today (the belt came off the drum) and I'll be helping finish it up when I get home tonight. (I'm very excited, as I (1) LOVE doing this type of thing and (2) know it's not an activity Dave would normally let me help with... Especially considering he did my nails last night, haha.)
Pictures and more will come tonight...
After we picked up the boys we went to church, and then home where the boys were blown away to see that Dave's TV has made it's way to Troy... And the Wii and old TV are now set up in Jacob's room. Dave has been VERY helpful in implementing discipline in the house, and not in a harsh manner. Actually, his method of discipline is all about earning respect and rights by giving respect and contributing to the house. So, the although the Wii and TV are now in Jacob's room, the remotes for all of the above are in our show organizer in the front hallway, out of reach in the top row of shoe holders. The boys are now aware that in order to play/watch ANYTHING, they must have done all their chores and have been respectful all day. There are no second chances on being respectful.
Later yesterday afternoon the four of us went to Brukner Nature Center. We walked the path(s) for a while, but because of all the rain, we suddenly found ourselves without a path and surrounded by mud and water. While at first we tried to stay dry and clean, it didn't work for two long. I will add pictures to this post later tonight. We almost had a pet snake, however (and thankfully) the thing escaped from Dave's pocket somewhere along the walk. I can't say I'm disappointed, although I know the boys were.
When we got home I attempted to wash/dry all of our sneakers however I managed to break the dryer in the process. Dave's been working on fixing it today (the belt came off the drum) and I'll be helping finish it up when I get home tonight. (I'm very excited, as I (1) LOVE doing this type of thing and (2) know it's not an activity Dave would normally let me help with... Especially considering he did my nails last night, haha.)
Pictures and more will come tonight...
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
DAY 73, Post 3
Well, this day isn't going as planned. I came out here to buy clothes and when I got to the register the money I had transferred into my account before I left home was gone. My business account is overdrawn and has been charged off and apparently they are taking funds from my other accounts to take care of my balance.
Soooo... I went to the bank across the street to get money out my checking account (I lost my debit card and ordered a new one this morning) and then drove back over to mall. I didn't park near the entrance because I was really upset and after 10 minutes I decided to get some food. Wouldn't you know, as I was pulling out of the mall parking lot, he drove by. Yea... I drive out here not intending to see him, bother him, etc. and he drives by ME. (I know it wasn't intentional.)
Unfortunately where I was planning on picking up a small lunch was in the same direction he was headed. I lost my appetite. I turned around when I got there and came back to the mall, where I am now. It didn't make me lose my appetite to see him so much as the possibility of being seen by him. I'm not here for him. And I don't want to piss him off.
So here I am, new clothes in a bag by my feet, trying to force myself to eat at this small mall Chinese restaurant that he took me to a couple times. And I'm just not hungry.
Please, God, tell me why he had to drive by then? What are you trying to tell me?
Soooo... I went to the bank across the street to get money out my checking account (I lost my debit card and ordered a new one this morning) and then drove back over to mall. I didn't park near the entrance because I was really upset and after 10 minutes I decided to get some food. Wouldn't you know, as I was pulling out of the mall parking lot, he drove by. Yea... I drive out here not intending to see him, bother him, etc. and he drives by ME. (I know it wasn't intentional.)
Unfortunately where I was planning on picking up a small lunch was in the same direction he was headed. I lost my appetite. I turned around when I got there and came back to the mall, where I am now. It didn't make me lose my appetite to see him so much as the possibility of being seen by him. I'm not here for him. And I don't want to piss him off.
So here I am, new clothes in a bag by my feet, trying to force myself to eat at this small mall Chinese restaurant that he took me to a couple times. And I'm just not hungry.
Please, God, tell me why he had to drive by then? What are you trying to tell me?
DAY 73, Post 2
It is a BEAUTIFUL day out here in Ohio. I decided to take my morning off to go shopping for an interview outfit/professional work outfit. My current work attire is jeans and a tee-shirt. I work tonight 4-11... And unfortunately tomorrow 8-4. I have an interview on Friday with an architectural placement firm, and I need something to wear that fits!
I have mixed emotions about entering the mall though. I have found Old Navy to be my favorite place to shop because the clothes fit great. But the mall, which I am sitting outside of right now, is right down the street from where he lives/lived. And although I would love to drive up the road and see if he is there, I need to... Stop. I can't make the small little drive. I need to prove to myself that I have the self-control. But its so damn hard. I guess this is when I need to pray. Jesus, please help me.
I plan on eating lunch while I am here. I brought my Bible to read while I am eating. Hopefully it will help me as well.
I have mixed emotions about entering the mall though. I have found Old Navy to be my favorite place to shop because the clothes fit great. But the mall, which I am sitting outside of right now, is right down the street from where he lives/lived. And although I would love to drive up the road and see if he is there, I need to... Stop. I can't make the small little drive. I need to prove to myself that I have the self-control. But its so damn hard. I guess this is when I need to pray. Jesus, please help me.
I plan on eating lunch while I am here. I brought my Bible to read while I am eating. Hopefully it will help me as well.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
DAY 66, Post 3
I'm taking steps in the moving-forward direction this morning. Whether they be the right steps or not, I guess only time will tell.
I called my attorney's office this morning and set up an appointment for next Friday morning to discuss bankruptcy. I still have feelings of guilt when considering bankruptcy, but I believe it really is something I need to consider. If given the choice between paying of the debt little-by-little, it could take me the rest of my life. And the last thing I want to think about, even at age 32, is leaving my boys debt when I die. So... I need to consider bankruptcy. I'm already operating on a cash-basis as far as finances go, and I have absolutely no intention of ever racking up debt on credit cards ever again.
Next, I received a call from a local, architectural and engineering focused employment agency. They had a job in the office, which was unfortunately more senior of a position then I am eligible for, which they wanted to speak to me about. Fortunately, the man told me they do get a number of jobs through their office, and he would like to sit down with me next week. So... Yay! I've already updated my resume(s) and gotten them back to him, so now I just have to wait and see what happens.
Lastly, I called a car insurance company to get a quote for my car. The car will be paid off and the title transferred to me in the next 30 days, so registration and car insurance are next on my list of bigger expenditures. Luckily we're not still living outside of New York City and the car insurance will be (relatively) affordable.
Oh! I also forgot to mention that I wrote up a monthly budget! It didn't have the car insurance cost as I didn't know that yet, however I'm seeing what I have to spend money on and how much money that will leave me at the end of every month. The leftover isn't very much, and it's plainly obvious to me that I need to get a higher paying job. I have so much to be grateful for though. One of my co-workers is working two jobs, probably both at the same rate as I'm getting paid, as she has FIVE children. I can't imagine being under that type of stress. Food, clothes, car-pools, activities, etc. It's hard enough with just my two boys! She is married though, but still... If he's making the same as us... It's got to be REALLY hard!
I called my attorney's office this morning and set up an appointment for next Friday morning to discuss bankruptcy. I still have feelings of guilt when considering bankruptcy, but I believe it really is something I need to consider. If given the choice between paying of the debt little-by-little, it could take me the rest of my life. And the last thing I want to think about, even at age 32, is leaving my boys debt when I die. So... I need to consider bankruptcy. I'm already operating on a cash-basis as far as finances go, and I have absolutely no intention of ever racking up debt on credit cards ever again.
Next, I received a call from a local, architectural and engineering focused employment agency. They had a job in the office, which was unfortunately more senior of a position then I am eligible for, which they wanted to speak to me about. Fortunately, the man told me they do get a number of jobs through their office, and he would like to sit down with me next week. So... Yay! I've already updated my resume(s) and gotten them back to him, so now I just have to wait and see what happens.
Lastly, I called a car insurance company to get a quote for my car. The car will be paid off and the title transferred to me in the next 30 days, so registration and car insurance are next on my list of bigger expenditures. Luckily we're not still living outside of New York City and the car insurance will be (relatively) affordable.
Oh! I also forgot to mention that I wrote up a monthly budget! It didn't have the car insurance cost as I didn't know that yet, however I'm seeing what I have to spend money on and how much money that will leave me at the end of every month. The leftover isn't very much, and it's plainly obvious to me that I need to get a higher paying job. I have so much to be grateful for though. One of my co-workers is working two jobs, probably both at the same rate as I'm getting paid, as she has FIVE children. I can't imagine being under that type of stress. Food, clothes, car-pools, activities, etc. It's hard enough with just my two boys! She is married though, but still... If he's making the same as us... It's got to be REALLY hard!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
DAY 65, Post 2
Well, today could be the day! And although I'm overwhelmingly excited about that possibility, I'm starting to feel very nervous. Honestly, I don't know what to do with myself.
I've written my list of wants, which I will give to my attorney as a reminder when I get there. And I hope that what I can get is somewhere close. The most important thing on the list, is something I really can't ask for, but I would like for him to not harass me anymore. It's becoming an ongoing issue, especially when he attends every single sporting event/practice for the boys, including on the days/weekends when I have the boys. I should note, however, that not only does he attend, but he sits right next to me. OK, not right next to me, but only leaving space for the kids between us. And he watches my every move.
I started my own personal counseling this morning. It was very personal, however I'm hoping to get a lot out of it. So far my therapist seems very communicative, which is definitely better than a couple of my past therapists. The type that just sits there and doesn't say a word doesn't do anything for me. I need to be pushed. I need to be challenged. And I hope to get this from her.
I weighed myself on the Wii balance board yesterday. It had me at 141 pounds. Yikes. Or Yay? I don't really know what to think. The funny thing is, the Wii said my ideal weight is 140 pounds. I haven't weighed 140 (or 141) pounds since I graduated college. And while I think I look great, I'm growing frustrated with having to buy new clothes. My favorite bra doesn't even fit anymore. Who would've known that boobs would shrink?
I've written my list of wants, which I will give to my attorney as a reminder when I get there. And I hope that what I can get is somewhere close. The most important thing on the list, is something I really can't ask for, but I would like for him to not harass me anymore. It's becoming an ongoing issue, especially when he attends every single sporting event/practice for the boys, including on the days/weekends when I have the boys. I should note, however, that not only does he attend, but he sits right next to me. OK, not right next to me, but only leaving space for the kids between us. And he watches my every move.
I started my own personal counseling this morning. It was very personal, however I'm hoping to get a lot out of it. So far my therapist seems very communicative, which is definitely better than a couple of my past therapists. The type that just sits there and doesn't say a word doesn't do anything for me. I need to be pushed. I need to be challenged. And I hope to get this from her.
I weighed myself on the Wii balance board yesterday. It had me at 141 pounds. Yikes. Or Yay? I don't really know what to think. The funny thing is, the Wii said my ideal weight is 140 pounds. I haven't weighed 140 (or 141) pounds since I graduated college. And while I think I look great, I'm growing frustrated with having to buy new clothes. My favorite bra doesn't even fit anymore. Who would've known that boobs would shrink?
Friday, March 25, 2011
DAY 54, Post 4
I took the boys' clothes over to DH's house and then got back in my car and started driving. It was about the time that I got to the square that I realized, "What am I doing?" I drove around the square and drove back home. And here I am...
I don't like being worried. I want to send a text to find out how he's doing. But I can't. I want to send an email. But I won't. I want to so terribly, but I won't. I dread this is his last couple of days with his daughter, and I'm not going to interupt that... Even if he's not checking his email.
So I'll sit here, watch TV and knit. I'm working on the pocket that goes on the front of the sweater. I'm thinking of finishing it, sewing it to the front and then stuffing it with Cellas. What good is a pocket if there's nothing worthwhile inside? Sure, I'd love for my hands to be inside, but... Big sigh.
I don't like being worried. I want to send a text to find out how he's doing. But I can't. I want to send an email. But I won't. I want to so terribly, but I won't. I dread this is his last couple of days with his daughter, and I'm not going to interupt that... Even if he's not checking his email.
So I'll sit here, watch TV and knit. I'm working on the pocket that goes on the front of the sweater. I'm thinking of finishing it, sewing it to the front and then stuffing it with Cellas. What good is a pocket if there's nothing worthwhile inside? Sure, I'd love for my hands to be inside, but... Big sigh.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
DAY 52, Post 3
Wow... Last week I bought new pants and they were size 8. I put on one of the pairs today and they were looser than they were last week. Considering they were on clearance last week at Old Navy for about $8 I decided to make another trip and see if they had any in size 6. Well, they did and... They fit! Woo hoo! I haven't been a size 6 since 2004! Now I just need to find healthy ways to keep this size.
Friday, March 18, 2011
DAY 47, Post 2
It's been quite a day, and emotionally draining just about the whole way.
I had forgotten that I had requested today off months ago for CL-WoW's birthday which is tomorrow, and it was hard to sit here thinking about that. Even though I closed last night and got out really late, I almost wished I would get called in today just so I would have something to keep my mind off of him.
But... I went to the mall. With having lost so much weight, my clothes are a constant battle for me. I managed to find some REALLY nice sales at Old Navy and got a pair of pants, two shirts and a dress (appropriate for interviews, work or going out) for a total of $40. I felt really good about that, although it does hurt to spend any money on myself.
After shopping I was tired (a combination of working late, going to bed at 2am and getting up at 7:30am) and laid down for a little bit. I finished reading Genesis, the first book of the Bible, and am looking forward to starting Exodus tomorrow. I tried to take a nap after, however Penny found the opportunity to bark at every single noise outside. And considering what a BEAUTIFUL day it was, there was a lot of noise between kids, people, etc.
Tonight Things 1 and 2 had their worst meltdown since we moved into this apartment. They were fighting over my computer, and it turned into a shoving/biting/hitting match. I told them it was time for bed (it was 8:30) and they had MAJOR fits. To the point that Thing 1 told me he was going to jump out his bedroom window and he wanted to live with his dad. That was sooo hard for me to hear. He also told me that he is a "bad boy" and none of the kids at school like him. It took about 20 minutes for me to correct this right frame of mind, and I had to tickle him until he would say "I'm not a bad boy." I do not want my boys to believe they are bad boys. Do they make bad decisions sometimes? Yes! But don't we all?
DH and I texted just a few minutes ago about the rough night, and it turns out the boys are telling both of us that the other parent gives them three chances. And we both tell them that they know the rules and one chance to correct their behavior is enough. It's nice that although we really can't talk, we can at least agree on one thing.
I had forgotten that I had requested today off months ago for CL-WoW's birthday which is tomorrow, and it was hard to sit here thinking about that. Even though I closed last night and got out really late, I almost wished I would get called in today just so I would have something to keep my mind off of him.
But... I went to the mall. With having lost so much weight, my clothes are a constant battle for me. I managed to find some REALLY nice sales at Old Navy and got a pair of pants, two shirts and a dress (appropriate for interviews, work or going out) for a total of $40. I felt really good about that, although it does hurt to spend any money on myself.
After shopping I was tired (a combination of working late, going to bed at 2am and getting up at 7:30am) and laid down for a little bit. I finished reading Genesis, the first book of the Bible, and am looking forward to starting Exodus tomorrow. I tried to take a nap after, however Penny found the opportunity to bark at every single noise outside. And considering what a BEAUTIFUL day it was, there was a lot of noise between kids, people, etc.
Tonight Things 1 and 2 had their worst meltdown since we moved into this apartment. They were fighting over my computer, and it turned into a shoving/biting/hitting match. I told them it was time for bed (it was 8:30) and they had MAJOR fits. To the point that Thing 1 told me he was going to jump out his bedroom window and he wanted to live with his dad. That was sooo hard for me to hear. He also told me that he is a "bad boy" and none of the kids at school like him. It took about 20 minutes for me to correct this right frame of mind, and I had to tickle him until he would say "I'm not a bad boy." I do not want my boys to believe they are bad boys. Do they make bad decisions sometimes? Yes! But don't we all?
DH and I texted just a few minutes ago about the rough night, and it turns out the boys are telling both of us that the other parent gives them three chances. And we both tell them that they know the rules and one chance to correct their behavior is enough. It's nice that although we really can't talk, we can at least agree on one thing.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
DAY 46, Post 2
I'm sitting at work, waiting for someone else to be ready to leave (we're not supposed to walk out alone when we work the closing shift) and I'm looking at my legs in my new jeans...
And damn... They look good!
And damn... They look good!
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
DAY 44, Post 2
I sit here, at work, leisurely enjoying my employee meal before my shift starts at 4pm. And I think...
It's strange how sometimes you are provided what you need right when you need it. For example, with $1 left in my bank account, I received a small child support payment today. Oh, what a surprise it was. And while I immediately thought about all the stuff I want to buy, I immediately reigned myself in and thought about what the money NEEDS to go towards... Rent. Utilities. Gas. Food.
But I went to pull my laundry out of the dryer and pulled out one of the pairs of jeans I've been wearing to work for the past two months. To say I can't wear them without a belt would be an understatement. Even with a belt they look like balloon pants. And I made a decision.
A half hour or so later, I walked out of Kohls with a brand new pair of jeans. The pair I wore in/out were size 14. The new pair (the first and only pair I tried on!) are size 8. Wow... Do I have Buyer's Remorse? Yes, a little. But damn, it feels incredible to wear jeans to work that feel AND look good.
It's strange how sometimes you are provided what you need right when you need it. For example, with $1 left in my bank account, I received a small child support payment today. Oh, what a surprise it was. And while I immediately thought about all the stuff I want to buy, I immediately reigned myself in and thought about what the money NEEDS to go towards... Rent. Utilities. Gas. Food.
But I went to pull my laundry out of the dryer and pulled out one of the pairs of jeans I've been wearing to work for the past two months. To say I can't wear them without a belt would be an understatement. Even with a belt they look like balloon pants. And I made a decision.
A half hour or so later, I walked out of Kohls with a brand new pair of jeans. The pair I wore in/out were size 14. The new pair (the first and only pair I tried on!) are size 8. Wow... Do I have Buyer's Remorse? Yes, a little. But damn, it feels incredible to wear jeans to work that feel AND look good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)