DAY 62, Post 3

I decided to take my yarn and knitting needles to the YMCA with me earlier today, both as a boredom buster and so that DH couldn't drive me crazy.  And somehow, during the three hours that we were there, I managed to start and nearly finish yet another block for my blanket!  I only had two, three-minute rows to finish after getting home (and a short nap), and voila! 

DAY 54, Post 3

I'm completely exhausted, yet my brain is in complete over-drive.  Actually, I have no desire to sit at home, and would get up and drive if I didn't have to finish drying clothes for the boys.  They are at DH's this weekend.  I can't say I won't be driving after I drop the clothes off at his house.  It's either that or pass out on the living room floor, as I don't feel like making my bed.

Work was...  Work today.  I kept my mouth shut and not that I ever let myself stand still (unless there is a customer at the register with me), I definitely didn't let myself stand still.  SK, one of the two managers I like, told me I did great today.  That made me feel better...  Sort of.  The funny, although not of the ha-ha kind, is that three others asked me if I had gotten my break today.  I guess it was made more of a conversation last night after I left.  I choose not to think about that though.

I look around my apartment, and although it's not a wreck, Penny knows how to make a mess while nobody's at home.  Yarn and shoes are strewn all over the living room, I know I really should clean them up.  But...  I really don't feel like it.  I want to snap my fingers like Mary Poppins and have everything put away where it belongs.

It's a good thing I'm not a drinker.  And by drinker I mean serious, hard-core drinker.  Because if I was, I would probably spend the night in a bar.  And a drink doesn't even sound appetizing, just the numbing effects do.

DAY 47, Post 2

It's been quite a day, and emotionally draining just about the whole way.

I had forgotten that I had requested today off months ago for CL-WoW's birthday which is tomorrow, and it was hard to sit here thinking about that.  Even though I closed last night and got out really late, I almost wished I would get called in today just so I would have something to keep my mind off of him.

But...  I went to the mall.  With having lost so much weight, my clothes are a constant battle for me.  I managed to find some REALLY nice sales at Old Navy and got a pair of pants, two shirts and a dress (appropriate for interviews, work or going out) for a total of $40.  I felt really good about that, although it does hurt to spend any money on myself.

After shopping I was tired (a combination of working late, going to bed at 2am and getting up at 7:30am) and laid down for a little bit.  I finished reading Genesis, the first book of the Bible, and am looking forward to starting Exodus tomorrow.  I tried to take a nap after, however Penny found the opportunity to bark at every single noise outside.  And considering what a BEAUTIFUL day it was, there was a lot of noise between kids, people, etc.

Tonight Things 1 and 2 had their worst meltdown since we moved into this apartment.  They were fighting over my computer, and it turned into a shoving/biting/hitting match.  I told them it was time for bed (it was 8:30) and they had MAJOR fits.  To the point that Thing 1 told me he was going to jump out his bedroom window and he wanted to live with his dad.  That was sooo hard for me to hear.  He also told me that he is a "bad boy" and none of the kids at school like him.  It took about 20 minutes for me to correct this right frame of mind, and I had to tickle him until he would say "I'm not a bad boy."  I do not want my boys to believe they are bad boys.  Do they make bad decisions sometimes?  Yes!  But don't we all?

DH and I texted just a few minutes ago about the rough night, and it turns out the boys are telling both of us that the other parent gives them three chances.  And we both tell them that they know the rules and one chance to correct their behavior is enough.  It's nice that although we really can't talk, we can at least agree on one thing.

DAY FIVE - Part 3

Ahhhh... A three hour rest after work and dinner with my boys has left me completely refreshed!  However now it's 11:25pm, and I'm awake with no intention of going to sleep soon and no clue what of what to do with myself.

Work was hectic today, as our District Manager made a surprise visit for the day, and despite his attempts to improve the restaurant, he seemed to slow us all down with constant interuptions and meetings.  I'm just glad I wasn't called out on, and he didn't notice that I forgot to put on my non-slip shoes at first.

Childcare continues to be an area of frustration for me...  I'm not receiving child support as of yet, and despite DH's lawyer's word that he would pay for childcare, I have not seen those funds yet either.  I won't deny that I am receiving assistance, however, the terms for the assistance only allow for a specific 6 hours per day, 1/2 hour of which the daycare is closed.  On days like today when school is once again cancelled because of the weather, I am left scrambling trying to find a place for Things 1 and 2 to go before they can go to daycare.  My friends have been wonderful in their willingness to help me over the past two months, however there's only so many times I can ask them to be a Mom-taxi for me.  I would like to just put them in full-time day-care, however that is just so far out of my budget.  It's almost a Catch-22 actually.  I have gotten a second job as a furniture rep covering Lima to Cincinnati, however I can't really start that position until I have full-time daycare.  And I can't pay for full-time daycare until I start the job and start making sales.  I've seen this so many times in the past in the interior design industry.  How are you supposed to get experience in a particular niche in the design industry (i.e. hospitality or retail) if no one will give you the opportunity to get experience?  OK...  So maybe it's not exactly the SAME thing.  But it feels like it...